Tuning in to Kids

Domain V · Systemic, relational, group & community · Sophie Havighurst, Ann Harley · 2007 · University of Melbourne, Australia

What it is

TIK is a manualised, emotion-focused parenting programme. Sophie Havighurst and Ann Harley developed it at the University of Melbourne. It teaches parents emotion coaching: noticing a child's emotion, naming it, empathising, and waiting for the feeling to settle before turning to the situation or…

Format

• Format
• Groups: up to 14 parents in a community group; up to 6 for higher-need or clinical groups. Ideally two facilitators.

Who practises it, and how they are trained or regulated

• Training: delivery requires TIK training. CEBC describes 2 days (14 hours), in Melbourne or on-site. Foundations describes 13 hours in person over 2 days, or 13.5 hours online across 3 sessions.
• Manual: available only with or after the training.
• Licensing: Foundations says no licence is required.

Questions to explore with your client

• What drew you to it, and what are you hoping it will change?
• Does it involve any substance, plant preparation, remedy or supplement? Has your doctor or prescriber been told, especially about any medication you take?
• Does it involve intense or unusual breathing? Have you been told about the medical conditions for which that is not advised?
• Does it involve fasting, a special diet or 'detox'? Have you discussed this with your doctor?
• Is it a group, retreat or community? How do they respond if someone wants to leave or raises a concern?
• Who runs it, and what training or registration do they hold?
• What actually happens in a session or meeting, and how often?
• What does it cost, and is there pressure to commit to more?
• How do you feel afterwards, in the hours and days that follow?
• Does it fit with, or clash with, the work we do here?

What practitioners of it watch for

• Shame about not practising (see 5.4).
• Session content cut for time. Problem solving taught before empathy is solid.
• Drift back to dismissing under stress, which is normal. Use boosters to re-practise.
• Parents who have no supports or show signs of depression (screen and refer; see 5.6).
• Parents dismissing the clip as unrealistic. If so, invite them to say how it would go in their house.

Problems the guide addresses

• "This is just being soft": fears of permissiveness
• Stuck at step 5: fixing, lecturing, reassuring
• Parent overwhelmed by own history or emotions
• Non-attendance and non-practice
• Ruptures with the facilitator or group
• Child or family needs beyond a community group
• Child's anger or aggression is dangerous
• Child refuses to talk or name feelings
• Sibling conflict
• Cultural fit and language

When to involve someone else

• New or worsening physical symptoms, or advice to stop or change prescribed medication: involve the client's doctor or prescriber.
• Signs of coercion, isolation from family and friends, escalating costs or secrecy: discuss openly and consider safeguarding.
• A crisis or thoughts of suicide: follow your crisis protocol. In the US, call or text 988; in the UK and Ireland, Samaritans on 116 123.

Drawn automatically from the guide's own sections. Stay curious: neither endorse nor dismiss what the client values, and check anything that matters against the full guide and its sources. Not medical advice.