Ceremony design

Domain XV · Nature, philosophy, social & rites of passage · 1987

What it is

"Ceremony design" is not one psychotherapy. It covers two related practices. Therapeutic ritual is designed with a client inside therapy. Secular ceremonies (humanist and civil funerals, namings, weddings, secular congregations) are run by celebrants and community bodies outside therapy. The…

Format

• This is a framework of practices rather than a manualised protocol. The phase structure below is van der Hart and Goossens' structure for leave-taking rituals. Fisher's three-part arc (preparing, experiencing, integrating) applies to any client-designed ritual. White's three-part ceremony is a…
• Preparatory phase. Goals: explain how a ritual can help, confirm the client's motivation (the authors warn the work is demanding and can stir anger, including at the deceased), inform family members, and agree a definitive contract that covers the ritual's design and the joint work. In the authors'…

Evidence status, as the guide reports it

• The idea that ritual has efficacy is presented here as these authors hold it. Outcome research on therapeutic ritual is not reviewed in this guide.

Questions to explore with your client

• What drew you to it, and what are you hoping it will change?
• Is there physical contact? Was it explained beforehand, and do you feel free to say no or stop at any point?
• Does it involve any substance, plant preparation, remedy or supplement? Has your doctor or prescriber been told, especially about any medication you take?
• Is it a group, retreat or community? How do they respond if someone wants to leave or raises a concern?
• How do you and the practitioner understand what is happening, in spiritual or cultural terms? Is that a source of comfort, worry, or both?
• Who runs it, and what training or registration do they hold?
• What actually happens in a session or meeting, and how often?
• What does it cost, and is there pressure to commit to more?
• How do you feel afterwards, in the hours and days that follow?
• Does it fit with, or clash with, the work we do here?

What practitioners of it watch for

• Abusive figures who should not be re-admitted to the "club"; the person controls membership. Working: a sense of being accompanied and recognised.
• Observances that slide into isolation or self-punishment; family members who misread them. Working: the client feels contained rather than burdened.
• Pressure to be artistic; symbols the therapist suggests rather than the client finds. Working: the client brings something that clearly matters to them.
• Isolated clients with no obvious guests; consider a smaller act, or building connection first (item 21). Working: renewed investment in present relationships.
• Contamination or washing compulsions; for these clients choose a non-washing act or leave this step out. Working: the client experiences a before and an after.

When to involve someone else

• New or worsening physical symptoms, or advice to stop or change prescribed medication: involve the client's doctor or prescriber.
• Signs of coercion, isolation from family and friends, escalating costs or secrecy: discuss openly and consider safeguarding.
• A crisis or thoughts of suicide: follow your crisis protocol. In the US, call or text 988; in the UK and Ireland, Samaritans on 116 123.

Drawn automatically from the guide's own sections. Stay curious: neither endorse nor dismiss what the client values, and check anything that matters against the full guide and its sources. Not medical advice.