Atlas›Domain XV · Nature, philosophy, social & rites of passage›Guide 073
Guide XV-073

Healing of Memories workshops (Lapsley)

Michael Lapsley1995Cape Town
A 38 · L 37 · M 2521 interventions in the Trinity explorer
Client cardCompare
[source: …] where a claim comes from[uncertain] not confirmed in a primary source[synthesis] the writer's reconstruction

1. Introduction

Version followed: the residential weekend workshop of the Institute for Healing of Memories (IHOM), Cape Town, as documented in Kayser's research report for the Centre for the Study of Violence and Reconciliation and IHOM (January 2000, Western Cape workshops), supplemented by IHOM's own programme evaluations (Niyodusenga and Karakashian, data 2005–2006; the Norad-published facilitator evaluation, 2012) and the descriptions of IHOM-North America. Lapsley's own account of a typical workshop (Redeeming the Past, 2012, ch. 12 "Deceptively Simple") is [uncertain: not verified] for detail. [source: Kayser 2000; Niyodusenga and Karakashian; Norad 2012; Catholic Books Review 2012]

Healing of Memories is not a psychotherapy. It is a facilitated group storytelling process, usually a residential weekend, in which people from different racial, political, cultural and religious backgrounds tell their own stories of harm "in an atmosphere of deep listening and mutual respect", using drawing, small-group sharing, a clay symbol and a closing celebration that participants devise. Facilitators are trained and experienced but not necessarily professionally qualified. [source: Niyodusenga and Karakashian pp. 5, 20, 34; Norad 2012 p. 4]

Origins: Fr Michael Lapsley SSM, an Anglican priest and former ANC chaplain who survived a letter bomb in Harare on 28 April 1990, worked on his return from exile as chaplain at the Trauma Centre for Victims of Violence and Torture in Cape Town. With the Counselling Working Group of the Religious Response to the Truth Commission he began workshops as a space for stories that the Truth and Reconciliation Commission's limited public hearings could not hear. Kayser dates the first workshops to 1995; the South African History Archive says IHOM was "established in 1998"; Kayser says it was formed in August 1998 and became independent of the Trauma Centre then. The Norad evaluation says the methodology was conceived during the TRC hearings (1996–1998) [uncertain: sources differ on the start date]. The method has since been used in Rwanda, Zimbabwe, Northern Ireland, Sri Lanka, East Timor, Australia, the United States and elsewhere, with refugees, prisoners, people living with HIV, survivors of domestic and sexual violence, veterans and first responders, and police and communities. [source: Kayser 2000, "A Short History"; SAHA; Catholic Books Review 2012; Pepperdine; Peace Insight]

How change is understood to happen (attributed): acknowledgement of a person's story by others is held to begin healing for individuals, communities and nations; telling the story with feeling, "from the heart, not from the head", and hearing others' different pain builds both personal release and mutual understanding; each workshop is one "step on the road towards healing", not a cure; letting go of anger, hatred, prejudice and guilt is the hoped-for direction; Lapsley's movement "from victim to survivor to victor" frames the journey. Lapsley holds that everyone needs healing for what they have done, failed to do, or had done to them. [source: Kayser 2000; Niyodusenga and Karakashian pp. 5, 10; Pepperdine; New Tactics]

Distinct from the Christian inner-healing prayer called "healing of memories" (Sanford and others): see XIII 228. Evidence status: IHOM's evaluations rest on end-of-workshop and postal questionnaires and interviews; a Durban master's case study reported participants' self-described "significant progress towards trauma healing and reconciliation"; no controlled trial is known [uncertain: not verified]. [source: Niyodusenga and Karakashian pp. 6–7, 23, 26; Theophile 2014]

What the psychotherapist does with it [synthesis]: assess a client's readiness and safety for a group storytelling weekend; prepare the client for what happens; coordinate with IHOM or an affiliate where the client consents; debrief and integrate afterwards, because the workshop has no ongoing support infrastructure and facilitators can only refer on; and, if trained through IHOM's own pathway, serve as a facilitator while keeping that role separate from any therapy relationship.

2. Framework

The workshop is a fixed sequence over a residential weekend (Friday evening to Sunday; SAHA calls them "three-day workshops"). Movement between stages follows the timetable, not clinical criteria; sources describe no formal screening or exit criteria [source: Kayser 2000; SAHA; Norad 2012 p. 4]. The pre- and post-workshop phases below are the therapist's frame [synthesis].

Phase 0: Before the workshop (therapist) [synthesis]. Goal: decide with the client whether a group storytelling weekend fits now, and prepare. Move on when the client has chosen freely, knows what will happen, has a support plan, and is stable enough to tell their story in front of strangers.

Phase 1: Friday evening, arrival and opening. Late-afternoon arrival and welcome by facilitators; after dinner a short drama of apartheid-era scenes (in the Western Cape, by the Mina Nawe theatre group) followed by open discussion; participants receive a question sheet for the next day. Goal: welcome, and move people past a purely intellectual approach. Evaluators advised avoiding threatening scenes with refugee groups. [source: Kayser 2000, "Friday"; Norad 2012 p. 12; Niyodusenga and Karakashian p. 14]

Phase 2: Saturday, drawing and storytelling. Each person spends about 45 minutes expressing their life story in colours and symbols (self-expression, not artistic skill). Small groups of 4–6 with two facilitators follow, with people who know each other placed in different groups; facilitators negotiate a confidentiality and respect agreement; each person has about 45 minutes to tell their story, and facilitators also share. Late afternoon, a plenary collects themes and questions, and five or six representatives draft the next day's celebration; an evening party follows. Goal: telling and being heard. [source: Kayser 2000, "Saturday", "Storytelling", "Discussion of Themes and Questions"]

Phase 3: Sunday, symbol, celebration and close. Participants shape clay into a symbol of their experience, the workshop and their hopes, and receive a candle. The celebration: a procession outside to burn written "negatives" in a drum fire; a circle (often in a chapel) with readings, songs, prayers and poetry contributed by each small group; possibly Holy Communion offered by Lapsley; each person presents their clay symbol and lights a candle for someone they choose. A feedback session closes the weekend and a follow-up meeting is agreed. [source: Kayser 2000, "The Clay Symbol", "The Celebration/Liturgy"]

Phase 4: Follow-up. A follow-up meeting about 3–4 weeks later (Saturday afternoon, church or hall), to which each former participant brings a friend who has not attended; one-day second-phase workshops and reunions. Follow-up is voluntary and has been limited by transport and by facilitator capacity; evaluators recommended an optional second weekend. [source: Kayser 2000, "Follow-up meeting"; Niyodusenga and Karakashian pp. 11, 33]

Phase 5: After the workshop (therapist) [synthesis]. Goal: debrief, contain anything reopened, and integrate the story and any relationships formed into ongoing work or a referral for trauma-focused treatment.

Programme variants named by IHOM sources: targeted refugee workshops; prison and HIV workshops (the latter with "somewhat different objectives"); the youth programme "Facing our Past, Facing Ourselves" in schools with the Department of Education and residential Youth Peace Academies; IHOM-North America workshops for veterans, first responders, police and communities, survivors of domestic violence and trafficking, people in residential substance-use treatment, and others. Their formats are not described in the sources [uncertain]. [source: Niyodusenga and Karakashian pp. 5–6; Peace Insight]

Facilitator pathway (as IHOM evaluations report it): attend two workshops as a participant; be recommended by an organisation and discussed by a small group before acceptance; training in modules (listening, handling emotions, creating a compassionate atmosphere, teamwork) plus role-plays rotating facilitator, storyteller and observer; then co-facilitate with an experienced facilitator (two to three or three to four workshops; the report gives both). Kayser describes training as two weekend sessions; one trainee described it as one weekend [uncertain: versions differ]. Facilitators are usually former participants, often from social professions, teaching or HR, and teams are mixed by culture, race, language, age and gender, with native speakers of participants' languages. [source: Norad 2012 pp. 4, 8, 14; Niyodusenga and Karakashian p. 19; Kayser 2000, "Facilitators"]

3. Guiding principles

  • Every person has a story, and every story is worth hearing. Do not rank whose story matters; give each the same attention. [source: Kayser 2000, "Key Concepts"]
  • Acknowledgement heals. Being heard and recognised, not being given information, is the active ingredient; aim to witness rather than explain. [source: Niyodusenga and Karakashian p. 10; New Tactics]
  • Do not compare suffering. Pain is acknowledged person by person, not grouped or ranked; correct comparisons gently. [source: New Tactics]
  • Shared damage without equivalence. Apartheid (or the conflict in question) damaged everyone, which gives common ground, but experiences are not equated; hold both. [source: Kayser 2000, "Every South African Has Been Damaged"]
  • All need healing, including for what they did or failed to do. Groups may include people who caused or failed to prevent harm; the frame is not victim-only. [source: Pepperdine]
  • From the heart, not from the head. Feelings and spiritual meaning are prioritised over analysis; invite feeling, do not debate. [source: Kayser 2000; Norad 2012 p. 9]
  • A journey, not a cure. One workshop is one step; set expectations accordingly and plan what comes next. [source: Kayser 2000; Niyodusenga and Karakashian p. 5]
  • Not therapy, but therapeutic. Ordinary people facilitate for ordinary people; Kayser nonetheless calls it clearly a therapeutic intervention, so clinical back-up matters. [source: Kayser 2000, "From the Heart"]
  • Safe space, no pushing. Facilitators create safety and do not press people to disclose; disclosure is the participant's choice. [source: Norad 2012 p. 8]
  • Confidentiality and gentleness. Ground rules are reminded, especially these two; restate them before each story. [source: Niyodusenga and Karakashian p. 21; Kayser 2000]
  • Forgiveness is not imposed. Lapsley says IHOM does not run forgiveness workshops; imposed apologies can feel like further violation. Never set forgiveness as a goal for the client. [source: Kayser 2000, "From Victim to Victor", "Anger and Forgiveness"]
  • Anger is legitimate. Facilitators can unintentionally signal that anger is improper; affirm it. [source: Kayser 2000, "Anger and Forgiveness"]
  • Faith-inclusive in principle, Christian in framing. Open regardless of belief, but participants reported both flexibility and exclusion; tell clients this in advance and adapt where you can. [source: Kayser 2000, "Religion and Spirituality"]
  • Tailor to cultural context. Methods are adapted to the group (e.g. no threatening drama for refugees); check that a given workshop has been. [source: New Tactics; Niyodusenga and Karakashian p. 14]
  • Healers pursue their own healing. Facilitators (and therapists) attend to their own stories and need debriefing. [source: New Tactics; Norad 2012 p. 10]
  • Do not promise what you cannot deliver. Broken promises of calls or reunions harm trust; promise only follow-up you will do. [source: Niyodusenga and Karakashian p. 11]
  • Voluntariness (therapist principle drawn from restorative practice): participation, and every disclosure within it, must be freely chosen; restorative processes rest on the "voluntary participation of those affected by harm". [source: EFRJ brief on the UNODC Handbook 2020] [synthesis for application here]
  • Role clarity. A therapist who also facilitates must manage multiple relationships under APA Ethics Code Standard 3.05; do not facilitate a workshop that includes your own clients without weighing this [synthesis].

4. Intervention inventory

The workshop components (4.5–4.16) are given as IHOM sources describe them, for a therapist preparing a client, supporting one afterwards, or co-facilitating after IHOM training. The therapist-side procedures (4.1–4.4, 4.17–4.21) are not described in IHOM sources and are marked [synthesis]. Sources describe no formal distress protocol for the workshop itself [source: Kayser 2000; Norad 2012].

4.1 Readiness and safety assessment before referral [synthesis]

  • Purpose / when: before a client signs up for, or is referred to, a Healing of Memories weekend; the workshop has no formal screening criteria in the sources and "opens up wounds" in a short weekend. [source for gap: Norad 2012; Kayser 2000, "Getting the Poison out"]
  • Steps: (1) Ask what the client hopes for and who suggested it; check the choice is their own. (2) Assess current trauma symptoms, dissociation, substance use, self-harm and suicide risk with your usual tools; current crisis or very recent loss argues for waiting. (3) Ask how the client copes after telling their story; if they have never told it, consider rehearsal in therapy first. (4) Check present safety: ongoing abuse, a perpetrator who may attend, community members who could breach confidentiality. (5) Check material circumstances (housing, food, work), since unmet survival needs can make a weekend destabilising. (6) Decide together: go now, go later, or another route (e.g. trauma-focused therapy).
  • Example language (illustrative): "These weekends ask you to tell your story to people you've just met. Before you decide, can we look at how you usually feel in the days after you talk about what happened?"
  • Watch for: pressure from a church, family or employer; hope that one weekend will fix things; recent self-harm; an active legal case. Working: the client can state why they are going, what may be hard, and whom they will contact if shaken.

4.2 Informed preparation: what actually happens [synthesis, content sourced]

  • Purpose / when: once a client decides to attend; surprises (a drama, a fire, a liturgy) can feel coercive.
  • Steps: (1) Walk through the sequence in Section 2: Friday drama and discussion, Saturday drawing and small-group story, plenary, party, Sunday clay, burning of "negatives", celebration and candles, feedback. [source: Kayser 2000] (2) Tell them it is residential, mixed in background, led by trained non-professional facilitators. [source: Niyodusenga and Karakashian p. 5] (3) Name the Christian framing and possible Communion, and that participation in any ritual element is optional [optionality: synthesis; check with organisers]. (4) Explain group confidentiality: agreed, not legally guaranteed. (5) Agree what the client will and will not share; disclosure is their choice. (6) Rehearse how to step out of a room or ask a facilitator for a break.
  • Example language (illustrative): "You decide how much of your story to tell. 'I'd like to say only this much' is a complete answer."
  • Watch for: the client agreeing to everything without questions; strong reaction to the idea of the drama or fire (adjust or reconsider). Working: the client asks practical questions and names a limit.

4.3 Evaluating a specific workshop before referral [synthesis]

  • Purpose / when: before recommending a particular event or organiser, since workshops vary by host and population.
  • Steps: (1) Confirm it is run by IHOM or an affiliate (e.g. IHOM-North America) and who leads it. [source: Peace Insight] (2) Ask how facilitators are trained and supervised (IHOM's pathway: two workshops as participant, modules, role-play, co-facilitation). [source: Norad 2012 p. 4] (3) Ask whether groups are tailored (refugee, veteran, survivor) and how the opening drama is chosen for that group. [source: Niyodusenga and Karakashian pp. 6, 14] (4) Ask what happens if someone is very distressed, and what follow-up exists. (5) Ask about language, disability access and cost. (6) Ask whether people from opposing sides of a harm may be in one group, and how acquaintances are separated. [source: Kayser 2000]
  • Example language (illustrative, to organiser): "My client is interested in attending. With their consent, could you tell me how you support someone who becomes very upset, and what follow-up you offer?"
  • Watch for: vague answers on distress and follow-up; promises of healing or forgiveness. Working: concrete answers and a named contact.

4.4 Support and aftercare plan [synthesis]

  • Purpose / when: before the weekend; sources say there is no infrastructure for ongoing support and facilitators can only refer on. [source: Kayser 2000]
  • Steps: (1) Book a session soon after the weekend. (2) Write a short plan: early signs of overwhelm, grounding skills already learned, a trusted person, crisis numbers (US 988; UK and Ireland Samaritans 116 123). (3) With consent, agree whether the organisers may contact you. (4) Plan transport home and the first evening after. (5) Note the follow-up meeting date when known.
  • Example language (illustrative): "Let's plan Sunday night now, while you're steady, so you're not deciding it when you're tired."
  • Watch for: the client declining any plan; isolation at home. Working: the plan exists in writing and the client knows when they will next see you.

4.5 Opening drama and open discussion (workshop component)

  • Purpose / when: Friday evening; to welcome and move participants beyond a cerebral approach. [source: Kayser 2000; Norad 2012 p. 12]
  • Steps (as described): welcome; dinner; a short drama of scenes from the conflict (in Cape Town, the Mina Nawe group's "That Spirit"); open-floor discussion; handing out the question sheet for Saturday. [source: Kayser 2000, "Friday"] For refugee groups, avoid threatening scenes. [source: Niyodusenga and Karakashian p. 14]
  • Example language (illustrative, facilitator): "You don't need to say anything tonight. If something in the play stayed with you, you're welcome to share it."
  • Watch for: startle, freezing or leaving the room (a sign the scenes have triggered memories); check in quietly. Working: people speak about their own reactions, not about the play's quality.

4.6 Reflection questions

  • Purpose / when: overnight before storytelling; to help each person think about their story. IHOM-North America describes reflection questions on identity, agency, justice, peace, healing and reconciliation. [source: Kayser 2000; Peace Insight] The question wording is not published in the sources and is not reproduced.
  • Steps: hand out the sheet; invite private reflection; say answers will not be collected. In therapy [synthesis]: a client can preview similar themes in session.
  • Example language (illustrative): "These questions are just for you. Notice which one you want to skip; that can tell you something too."
  • Watch for: sleeplessness or rumination overnight. Working: the client arrives with a sense of what they want to say.

4.7 Life-story drawing

  • Purpose / when: Saturday morning, before small groups; reflection on past experience through colour and symbol, self-expression not art. [source: Kayser 2000; Norad 2012 p. 10; Niyodusenga and Karakashian p. 20 (crayon drawing)]
  • Steps: provide paper and crayons; invite each person to put their life story into colours and symbols for about 45 minutes; reassure about skill; the drawing is later used to tell the story in the small group. [source: Kayser 2000]
  • Example language (illustrative): "There's no right way. Shapes, colours, a single line, all of it counts."
  • Watch for: paralysis over "I can't draw"; very rapid, flooded drawing. Working: the person uses the drawing as a map when telling their story.

4.8 Small-group agreement

  • Purpose / when: opening each small group (4–6 people, two facilitators, acquaintances placed apart); to build a safe space. [source: Kayser 2000, "Storytelling"]
  • Steps: facilitators negotiate an agreement on confidentiality and respect with the group, ask the group to create a "safe space", and remind members of ground rules, especially confidentiality and gentleness. [source: Kayser 2000; Niyodusenga and Karakashian p. 21]
  • Example language (illustrative): "What would each of you need from this group to feel able to speak?"
  • Watch for: members who know each other despite placement; silence that hides disagreement. Working: each member contributes a need.

4.9 Storytelling with deep listening

  • Purpose / when: the heart of the weekend; acknowledgement of each story. [source: Niyodusenga and Karakashian p. 5]
  • Steps: each person in turn has about 45 minutes to tell their story; others listen without interrupting, comparing or advising; facilitators also share their own stories. [source: Kayser 2000]
  • Example language (illustrative, facilitator): "Thank you for trusting us with that. Take a moment before we go on."
  • Watch for: comparison of suffering, advice-giving, others' distress triggered by a story. Working: listeners reflect what they heard; the teller reports feeling heard.

4.10 Facilitator tasks during storytelling

  • Purpose / when: throughout the small group.
  • Steps: hold space for tears, fear and anger, which are expected and affirmed; provide tissues and water; balance time among participants; draw out positive elements in stories; create safety without pushing; when someone cries deeply, stay present and seek help from the experienced co-facilitator. [source: Kayser 2000; Norad 2012 p. 8]
  • Example language (illustrative): "You don't need to stop crying to keep going. We're here."
  • Watch for: a facilitator rushing someone, or labelling anger improper (Kayser documents this risk); dissociation (glazed look, losing time). Working: the teller completes at their own pace and returns to the group.

4.11 Plenary: themes and questions

  • Purpose / when: Saturday late afternoon; to move from individual stories to shared themes without breaching confidentiality. [source: Kayser 2000, "Discussion of Themes and Questions"]
  • Steps: the whole workshop gathers; each small group reports themes and questions (not individual stories); the plenary chooses five or six representatives to draft the celebration; an evening party follows. [source: Kayser 2000]
  • Example language (illustrative): "What themes came up in your group that you're comfortable sharing, without anyone's personal details?"
  • Watch for: a group reporting identifying details; a participant hearing their story retold. Working: themes are general and members recognise their group's work.

4.12 Co-creating the celebration

  • Purpose / when: Saturday evening into Sunday; participants, not facilitators, devise the closing celebration. [source: Kayser 2000; Niyodusenga and Karakashian pp. 20, 34]
  • Steps: representatives draft the order; each small group contributes readings, songs, prayers or poetry; the plan is shared before Sunday. [source: Kayser 2000] Faith-inclusive adaptation [synthesis]: invite secular as well as religious contributions and say plainly that joining any prayer is optional.
  • Example language (illustrative): "What would make this closing feel like yours, whatever you believe?"
  • Watch for: one tradition dominating; participants of other or no faith falling silent (Kayser documents feelings of exclusion). Working: varied contributions and wide participation.

4.13 Clay symbol

  • Purpose / when: Sunday morning; to give form to the person's experience, the weekend and their hopes. [source: Kayser 2000, "The Clay Symbol"; Niyodusenga and Karakashian (clay peace symbol)]
  • Steps: provide clay; invite each person to shape a symbol of their experience, the workshop and their hopes; each receives a candle; symbols are presented at the celebration. [source: Kayser 2000]
  • Example language (illustrative): "Let your hands find a shape for what you're taking home."
  • Watch for: symbols wholly of despair (follow up gently later); embarrassment. Working: the person can say in a sentence what the symbol means.

4.14 Burning the "negatives"

  • Purpose / when: opening the Sunday celebration; a symbolic letting go of destructive feelings. [source: Kayser 2000, "The Celebration/Liturgy"; Niyodusenga and Karakashian p. 5]
  • Steps (as described): participants write their "negatives" on paper; the group processes outside; papers are burned in a drum fire. [source: Kayser 2000] Safety [synthesis]: a contained fire, a responsible adult in charge, attention to anyone for whom fire is a trauma cue, and an alternative (tearing, burying) offered.
  • Example language (illustrative): "You can burn it, keep it, or tear it. Letting go doesn't have to happen today."
  • Watch for: fire as a trauma reminder (burning was part of some violence); the expectation that feelings will be gone afterwards. Working: the person treats it as a marker, not a test.

4.15 Celebration circle, symbols and candles

  • Purpose / when: Sunday; shared acknowledgement and hope. [source: Kayser 2000]
  • Steps (as described): gather in a circle, often in a chapel; readings, songs, prayers and poetry from each small group; Holy Communion may be offered by Lapsley; each person presents their clay symbol and lights a candle for someone they choose. [source: Kayser 2000] Prayers are named, not quoted, here.
  • Example language (illustrative, facilitator): "As you light your candle, you can name the person aloud or keep them in your heart."
  • Watch for: pressure to receive Communion or pray; tears at the candle for a dead or disappeared person (grief work afterwards; see 4.17). Working: each person takes part in their own way.

4.16 Feedback and follow-up meeting

  • Purpose / when: end of Sunday, then about 3–4 weeks later. [source: Kayser 2000]
  • Steps: a feedback session; agree a date for the follow-up meeting (Saturday afternoon, church or hall); each former participant brings a friend who has not attended; one-day second-phase workshops and reunions where offered. [source: Kayser 2000; Niyodusenga and Karakashian p. 11] Promise only follow-up that will happen. [source: Niyodusenga and Karakashian p. 11]
  • Example language (illustrative): "We will meet again on [date]. If you can't come, here's who to contact."
  • Watch for: transport barriers; unfulfilled promises of calls. Working: attendance and continued contact among participants.

4.17 Post-workshop debrief in therapy [synthesis]

  • Purpose / when: first session after the weekend; to contain what opened and integrate it.
  • Steps: (1) Ask open questions: what stayed with you, what surprised you, how have you slept. (2) Screen for new or worse intrusions, dissociation, substance use, self-harm and suicidal thoughts. (3) Invite the client to show or describe the drawing and clay symbol. (4) Identify what the client told for the first time and how being heard felt. (5) Note material that needs trauma-focused treatment, grief work or practical help, and plan it. (6) Clarify any group contacts the client wants to keep.
  • Example language (illustrative): "You told your story to strangers this weekend. What was it like to be listened to that way?"
  • Watch for: a crash after a high; shame about what was said; a new conviction that they "should" forgive. Working: the client can hold the experience as one step and name the next.

4.18 Working with forgiveness and anger without imposing [synthesis, grounded in sourced principles]

  • Purpose / when: when a client leaves with questions or pressure about forgiveness, or ashamed of anger. Lapsley says IHOM does not run forgiveness workshops and that forgiveness should not be imposed. [source: Kayser 2000]
  • Steps: (1) Separate forgiveness from reconciliation, from excusing, and from giving up justice. (2) Affirm anger as a legitimate response. (3) Ask whose voice says they should forgive. (4) Leave forgiveness, if ever, to the client's own time and values.
  • Example language (illustrative): "You don't owe anyone forgiveness. We can look at what you want, on your own timetable."
  • Watch for: spiritual pressure from a community; self-blame. Working: the client describes their stance in their own words, without guilt.

4.19 Coordination and referral with IHOM [synthesis]

  • Purpose / when: when the client consents to contact, or facilitators wish to refer a participant on. Facilitators are trained to identify participants who need professional follow-up and refer them, e.g. to individual counselling. [source: Niyodusenga and Karakashian p. 11]
  • Steps: (1) Get written consent stating what may be shared. (2) Share only what the facilitators need for safety. (3) Offer yourself as a referral destination for participants who need counselling, with clear terms on fees and waiting times. (4) Respect the confidentiality of the group's stories.
  • Example language (illustrative, to facilitator): "With your participant's consent, I can offer an assessment within two weeks. What would help you make that referral?"
  • Watch for: facilitators passing on other participants' stories; being drawn into running workshops without training. Working: smooth, consented handovers.

4.20 Facilitator self-care and debriefing

  • Purpose / when: after each workshop; facilitators reported emotional upset from painful stories and asked for regular debriefing; evaluators called debriefing "haphazard at best". [source: Norad 2012 pp. 9–11; Niyodusenga and Karakashian p. 19]
  • Steps (therapist as facilitator or as supporter of a facilitator team) [synthesis]: schedule a structured debrief before people disperse; review moments of strong distress and how they were handled; identify personal triggers; arrange supervision or personal therapy where needed; check in a week later.
  • Example language (illustrative): "Which story are you still carrying today?"
  • Watch for: facilitators dropping out, fear of returning (documented). Working: facilitators stay and report feeling supported.

4.21 Becoming a facilitator and managing dual roles

  • Purpose / when: a therapist wishing to facilitate. IHOM's pathway: two workshops as participant, recommendation and selection, modular training with role-play, co-facilitation. [source: Norad 2012 p. 4; Niyodusenga and Karakashian p. 19]
  • Steps [synthesis]: (1) Complete IHOM's pathway; do not run Healing of Memories workshops on the strength of clinical training alone. (2) Clarify in writing whether you act as facilitator or clinician at a given workshop. (3) Avoid facilitating groups that include current clients, or weigh it under APA Ethics Code Standard 3.05. (4) Check insurance cover for group facilitation outside clinical practice. (5) Keep the IHOM frame (ordinary people for ordinary people) rather than turning it into group therapy.
  • Example language (illustrative, to co-facilitators): "In this group I'm a facilitator, not anyone's therapist. If someone needs clinical help, we'll refer them as we would anyone."
  • Watch for: participants seeking therapy from you mid-workshop; blurred boundaries afterwards. Working: clear roles and appropriate referrals.

5. Handling problems

IHOM sources describe several of these problems but give few responses; responses are [synthesis] unless a source is cited.

  • Overwhelm during the weekend. Sources expect tears, fear and anger and affirm them, but describe no distress protocol. [source: Kayser 2000; Norad 2012] Response [synthesis]: in preparation, agree a signal and a break plan; afterwards, ground, normalise, and assess safety; for a facilitator, slow the pace, offer a pause and involve the co-facilitator. If dissociation or panic persists, the person should not be pressed to finish their story.
  • Wounds reopened with no follow-up. A facilitator warned that the weekend opens wounds and is too short to go slowly; there is no ongoing support infrastructure. [source: Kayser 2000] Response [synthesis]: pre-book a session (4.4); refer for trauma-focused treatment where symptoms persist; do not treat the workshop as a substitute for treatment.
  • Suicidal thoughts or self-harm afterwards. Response [synthesis]: standard risk assessment and safety planning; lethal-means counselling (safe storage and removal); crisis resources: 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline (US), Samaritans 116 123 (UK and Ireland).
  • Pressure to forgive or reconcile. Imposed apologies can feel like further violation; IHOM does not run forgiveness workshops. [source: Kayser 2000] Response: 4.18.
  • Anger treated as improper. Facilitators may unintentionally label anger improper, leaving participants feeling inadequate. [source: Kayser 2000] Response [synthesis]: affirm anger in debrief; as a facilitator, reflect anger without correcting it.
  • Exclusion by Christian framing. Participants reported both flexibility and exclusion. [source: Kayser 2000] Response [synthesis]: prepare clients in advance; ask organisers about inclusive elements; in therapy, explore what the religious frame meant to the client. Where distress centres on faith or its loss, the DSM-5-TR category "Religious or Spiritual Problem" (ICD-10-CM Z65.8, which lists religious or spiritual problem under Includes) may apply [source: ICD-10-CM Z65.8 (Unbound Medicine); DSM-5-TR wording [uncertain]]; use the Cultural Formulation Interview with its spirituality, religion and moral traditions module.
  • Broken promises of contact. Participants were disappointed when promised calls or reunions did not happen. [source: Niyodusenga and Karakashian p. 11] Response: promise only what you will do; repair openly if you fail.
  • Unmet material needs. Workshops may destabilise people whose main concern is survival; participants asked for links to employment and education. [source: Kayser 2000] Response [synthesis]: address practical needs first or alongside; link to social services.
  • Return to an unchanged reality. Discrimination and hardship at home can erase the workshop's impact. [source: Kayser 2000] Response [synthesis]: name this in preparation; in debrief, separate what changed inside from what did not change outside; consider collective or advocacy routes (see V 137 liberation psychology).
  • Frightening drama. Threatening scenes frightened refugees. [source: Niyodusenga and Karakashian p. 14] Response: ask about the drama when evaluating a workshop (4.3); prepare the client; agree they may leave.
  • Someone from the other side of the harm, or a known person, in the group. Groups mix backgrounds and acquaintances are separated. [source: Kayser 2000] Response [synthesis]: before referral, ask whether a person who harmed the client, or their community, may attend; survivors of domestic or sexual violence should attend only workshops designed for them and never with the person who harmed them. Restorative practice guidance treats intimate-partner and sexual violence as requiring specific procedural safeguards. [source: EFRJ brief on the UNODC Handbook 2020; application here synthesis] Watch for coercion and power imbalance.
  • Stuck or silent participant. Response [synthesis]: silence is permitted; the drawing or symbol can speak for them; in therapy, explore what made speaking hard without treating it as failure.
  • "Resistance" to attending, or a client who attends repeatedly instead of treatment. Response [synthesis]: respect a decision not to go; if workshops become a substitute for needed trauma treatment, discuss the difference between being heard and being treated.
  • Confidentiality breach in a small community. Group confidentiality is agreed, not guaranteed. [source for agreement: Kayser 2000] Response [synthesis]: prepare for this risk; if it happens, support the client and, with consent, inform organisers.
  • Language and access barriers. IHOM aims for facilitators who speak participants' languages; transport limited follow-up. [source: Kayser 2000] Response [synthesis]: check interpretation, disability access and transport before referral.
  • Rupture with the therapist over the referral. Response [synthesis]: if the client felt pushed into, or blocked from, the workshop, acknowledge it directly and return the decision to them.
  • Facilitator vicarious trauma. Documented. [source: Norad 2012 pp. 9–11] Response: 4.20.
  • Therapist dual roles. Response: 4.21 and APA Ethics Code Standard 3.05.

Sources

Cross-references: XIII 228 (healing of memories, Sanford, Christian inner healing); V 137 (liberation psychology).

← Previous · XV-072Fambul Tok bonfire forgiveness ceremoniesNext · XV-074 →Collective and community trauma healing